Still Sober

Hello my name is Lizz and I'm a part-time alcoholic. A stormy weather drinker. Any port in a storm.

It's been over a month and I'm still not drinking. It's still novel to me. It's quite amazing how drinking used to limit me, limit my choices. Even little every day things. For example, I used to drink every Friday night. Not much but normally 2 or 3 drinks. One drink is enough for me to become instantly lethargic, my desire to do anything fades like a tropical mist. So 2 or 3 and I'm really inert.

So now on Friday nights, after my standard homemade pizza with my Dad, I think to myself, 'Oh, I might do a load of washing now' or 'I might read my new book I'm really into' or any number of things. This doesn't really sound like much and a lot of you may be thinking, what's so great about washing your clothes on a Friday night, but its more about a change in thinking, an opening up to life, of not accepting self-imposed limits.

I'm in Fiji at the moment on Day 1 of a writer's course. It's been amazing so far already. I love hearing people's stories. Everyone has this desire to tell stories whether they are based on fact or not. It's just fascinating. They are mostly middle-age women, apart from one older man. But they are a ripe and rowdy lot, and as you can imagine with a bunch of writers, our conversations go off on creative tangents with no holes barred.

So far I've navigated the cocktails and beer at the bar. And the complimentary wine with dinner. I've resisted but the funny thing is I have no desire to drink. The only desire to drink would be due to a desire to cure my social anxiety but now that we have had a morning writing session together, I now feel a lot more comfortable with everyone.

This week is gonna be amazing. Good things are coming, I can feel it. And it all started with choosing life.